Bukan pertama kali but this is my journey. Tadi lalu FYP dekat TT, semakin kita diuji, semakin Allah sayang, kuncinya adalah sabar. Sometimes I am questioning myself, why my way of journey difference from others. Then I ask me, how do I know is not the same, what if they good at pretending. So, okaylah the conclusion kena sabar. Allah will guide you the way.
Aku kenalkan diri aku sikit. Boleh panggil Joji or Jiji. Why, sebab boleh. Hahahaha. Dulu aku menulis and I have created a lot of stories but I always ragu2 with myself. I always compare myself with my surrounding and I always pick the difference way with other. Without support from others, I became stone, I think I don't belong to show myself cause I'm weird. In 2018, I been diagnosed with MDD. It quite hard but I'm getting used to it. So, I guess, the reason for my blog supposed to be like my lifelong diaries.
As an independence woman, I work hard on it. Tak mudah dan tak susah. Allah always guide me. I choose "Permulaan" as my first title. Actually, I had started a lot of beginning but sometimes the way is not the answer, so I keep on searching and I don't have a choice. Yes, I don't have a choice and just walk away. Sabar adalah kunci kepada itu. Communication is an issue in my life. I don't talk normally like others. So that's why I need to choose who to talk to because I don't want people misunderstood my words. Maybe in writing is the best ways for me to express my feelings and moods.
Semakin hari semakin Jiji rasa kekerasan hidup ini. sometimes I thought of suicide but in Islam, we are forbidden to do it. So kena sabar. Maybe Jiji akan jarang menulis sebab I kena ikut diri I how to handle my stress. Sometimes I boleh handle stress dengan menulis, or game, or hang out or something else. So, I just prepare this blog for myself to express me. Yes, I had stopped my therapy for MDD because after I in med, I just realize, the depression is part of me, so I don't have a choice but to accept it. I'm not normal like others. I'm just me, Jiji.
Thats it for now. Chau and peace. ✌❤
